[Books] Breakfast with Seneca: A Stoic Guide to the Art of Living

Seneca was a Stoic philosopher of Ancient Rome, and this book is about his philosophy

According to Socrates, gym is to keep your body healthy, and philosophy is to care for the soul

“What I also discovered in Seneca’s writings is that nothing significant has changed in human nature over the last two thousand years, which made everything he had to say contemporary. Vanity, greed, ambition, pursuit of luxury, and runaway consumerism—aspects of Rome’s elite, decadent society that Seneca described in detail—are all still very much with us.”

This is one reason why I read many old books and watched many old movies

“For the Stoics, the only things fully under our control are our inner powers of judgment, opinion, and decision making, our will, and how we interpret the things we experience.”

这就是所谓的free will

“When something negative happens, or when we are struck by adversity, we shouldn’t be surprised by it, but see it as an opportunity to create a better situation.”

读这本书的时候恰逢我走出一个人生低谷，然后发现自己走出困境的philosophy和stoic非常的类似

“For the Stoics, every challenge or adversity we encounter is an opportunity to both test and develop our inner character.”

把人身的困难当成对自己内在品质的考验

“Also, to believe that misfortunes will never befall us would be out of touch with reality. Instead, we should actively expect occasional bumps in the road, and sometimes major ones.”

不要期待人生的完美

“living the best possible life, or a life truly worth living, might involve some pain.”

虽然这样说有一点歌颂苦难的意思，which is something I am totally against，但是有的时候为了追求a life truly worth living，痛苦确实是不可避免的。比如，只要走出自己的舒适区，就会遇到挫折和失败，而这份痛苦是超越自我的过程中不可避免的。

Real philosophy involves “making progress.”

和我对人生的快乐需要delta的理念不谋而合

“How many things we acquire only because others bought them and because they are in a good many homes”

很多人其实都没有自己的主见，这也是我不太care别人的看法的原因之一

很开心我竟然能和几千年前的罗马哲学家产生这么多的共鸣。超越时间和空间的限制，和伟大的灵魂对话，这就是书籍的意义吧

stoic哲学和我的哲学一样，都是入世哲学。也就是说，不仅要在精神上追求peace和幸福，还要获得俗世中的成功，比如当上CEO，迎娶白富美😂

stoic哲学里也提到了自省。好的道理不仅transcend时间，还会transcend文化

“The most basic level of friendship, Aristotle explains, relies on mutual advantage.”

“The next form of friendship relies on mutual pleasure.”

“The deepest level of friendship for Aristotle, however, is based on mutual admiration, in which each person sees something he or she admires in the other person’s character.”

Now, I understand why I don’t have friends 😂

“Value Your Time: Don’t Postpone Living”

不要把希望寄托在未来，这样会让当下的自己成为未来自己的工具人。你可以从此刻就开始living

“time is our most valuable possession”

“Because our lives are finite, each person has only a limited amount of time remaining.”

“While people tend to be very careful in guarding their physical property and financial savings, he says that when it comes to protecting their most valuable asset, many let it slip away.”

我们总是忽略了自己最valuable的possession是自己的时间，就像是我们也总是忽略最值得我们爱与尊重的人是我们自己

“Seneca is quite dubious about people who engage in constant “busyness,” running around as if they have many important tasks to do, while accomplishing little of significance in the process. Sometimes, the way people communicate their busyness seems little more than a form of show. In his words, “Loving to rush around is not proof someone is hardworking—it’s only the restlessness of an agitated mind.” Unlike work accomplished with real mental focus, acting like you’re busy is a waste of time.”

“The problem with busyness for Seneca is that it leads to mental preoccupation with trivial concerns.”

忙碌是为了充分利用自己宝贵的时间，而不是为了表现的忙碌感动自己、抑或是为了别人的看法演戏

“One crucial idea for Seneca is that we shouldn’t postpone living now in the hope that we will one day be able to retire and live the life we always dreamed of.”

把希望寄托在明天，就是让今天的自己成为明天的自己的奴隶。未来固然重要，但是我们为此刻而活

“For people in ancient Greece and Rome, freedom did not mean so much the freedom “to do whatever you like” (or license); it meant the freedom of self-mastery or “freedom from.” It meant self-possession, belonging to yourself, and not being a slave to anything.”

很喜欢这个对于自由的定义

“For Seneca, being able to plan for the future is one of the most amazing gifts that human beings possess. The ability to plan ahead, and to create many things of value, depends upon foresight, which is our inner way of imagining the future.”

Humans are the only species on Earth with the capability to use past experiences and knowledge to predict the future

我因为OCD了解到cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT)。这本书里提到CBT的founder, Albert Ellis, 在CBT里借鉴了了Stoics。知识串联起来了

“ABC Theory of Emotion, which was directly based on Stoic philosophy. First, with A, there is an Activating event. Then with B, there is a Belief, opinion, or judgment. And finally there appears C, Consequences, which is usually an emotional result of the earlier belief.”

“Nearly 20 percent of people in the United States suffer from anxiety disorders.”

在美国，5个人里面就有1个人有焦虑症

“Angry people tend to demand things: fairness, appreciation, agreement, willingness to do things their way. Everyone wants these things, and we are all hurt and disappointed when we don’t get them, but angry people demand them, and when their demands aren’t met, their disappointment becomes anger.”

愤怒的本质是需求得不到满足

“Realize that people often have no idea about what they’re doing, and do things in error, so don’t take their actions too seriously.”

“If you want to escape your troubles, you don’t need to be somewhere else: you need to be someone else.”

“people can misuse travel. These are the kinds of people who will use any possible diversion to avoid facing their inner lives—and to avoid whatever it is they need “to work on”. “

“first proof of a stable mind is its ability to stay in one place and enjoy its own company.”

旅行应该是exploration，而不是逃避

“For Seneca, having leisure time was one of the finest things in life. But leisure is only fulfilling if the mind is stable and well-developed enough to really enjoy it.”

只有拥有inner peace的人，才能真正的享受闲暇时光

“what you actually get out of life depends on what you bring to it.”

“We should live with this belief: ‘I was not born for one small corner. This entire world is my homeland.’”

“we should expect adversity to occasionally cross our paths because “hardships arrive through a law of nature.””

“He explains that people who suddenly become wealthy often lose their psychological balance. They “imagine that their good luck will never end and that their gains will not just continue but increase. Having forgotten this trampoline on which human affairs bounce up and down, they feel certain that chance will remain steady for them alone.””

“since things swing back and forth, no one should be overly confident when things go well, or give up when things go poorly”

人生不是平稳的直线，而是起起伏伏的曲线

“for many people, the acquisition of riches has not been the end of their troubles, but merely a change in their troubles.”

“when people become suddenly wealthy, it amplifies their existing character traits.”

“when they become wealthy, it increases their sense of self-importance and amplifies their negative character traits”

这可能是暴发户讨人厌的原因，本质上不是因为他们有钱，而是他们本就有的负面character被金钱放大了

“Another problem associated with extreme wealth is the challenge of maintaining it.”

“If I lose my wealth, it will only take itself. But if you lose your wealth, you will be in shock, and you’ll feel as though you’ve lost your very self. For me, wealth has a place, but for you, it holds the highest value. In the end, I own my wealth, but your wealth owns you.”

“Thomas Jefferson (1743–1826), who wrote the first draft of the Declaration of Independence, was, like other Founders, thoroughly familiar with the ideas of Seneca, the Stoics, and Cicero. Jefferson’s own concept of natural law was Stoic. And when Jefferson wrote the words, “All men are created equal,” it mirrored the Stoic idea of human equality.”

原来独立宣言里竟然还有Stoic哲学的影子，长见识

“For the first time in our collective history, we must think of ourselves as a single tribe in a single planet.”

人类社会的归属感逐渐从部落，减小到家庭，减小到个体，这是社会发展的趋势。人们变得越来越自由，也越来越孤独

“when traveling, it’s important to have a real destination rather than just wandering about randomly.”

Life is a journey, 这就是为什么我为自己设置了长期的目标，有一些甚至遥不可及，因为我认为人生的幸福需要有一个自己认可的长期目标

“Another way to live with authenticity and consistency is to present yourself to the world as you really are.”

“life cannot be happy or free from anxiety for those who constantly live behind a mask,”

不真诚最大的问题是，让你打心底里觉得真实的自己是不好的，非常影响自己的价值感。

接受身上那些自己所认为的缺点，并且不惧怕被人看到

“being a philosopher means that a person is a critical thinker and not just a believer.”

这就是为什么作为生活哲学家的我，是无法相信任何宗教的

“If knocked to the ground, Stoics will stand up, brush themselves off, keep training, and keep moving forward.”

就像我在《走出低谷》那篇文章中说的，命运的重拳可以将我击倒，但是我永不言弃

Socrates是为了捍卫自己的价值观而死的，我曾经也为捍卫自己的value付出过巨大的代价。一方面，我很为自己的勇气而骄傲，另一方面，也觉得自己太蠢了。死人或许更容易成为英雄，但是只有活着的人才能改变世界

“philosophy is a preparation for death”

难怪我天天思考死亡，原来我只是在做一个哲学家应该做的事情😂

“many elderly people have simply “existed” for a long time but never truly lived. Some people, unfortunately, end up dying before they have even started to live fully.”

人生不是从你出生开始算起的，而是从你开始真正的生活才开始的

我以前总是把注意力放在自己追求的东西上，这固然可以benefit未来。但是我也应该常常提醒自己所拥有的东西，appreciate命运给我的馈赠，因为这可以让我更好的享受当下

人性中总是有一些善的地方，有一些恶的地方；世界总是有一些好的地方，有一些坏的地方；人生也是有一些美好的地方，有一些痛苦的地方。我总是喜欢盯着阴暗面看，自然会消极失望，觉得人生不值得。其实我也应该多去感受积极的一些方面。而且我再想想，别人的恶，恰能衬托出我的善；世界上的坏，也同样意味着business/politics opportunity；人生中的痛苦，不仅让我养成坚韧的品格，深刻的思想，还能让我学会appreciate自己所拥有的一切。

什么是爱？不求回报的付出是爱，发自内心的欣赏是爱

“if we see someone who is unhappy or miserable, we can know, with confidence, that person is not free.”

“to be free is to remain undisturbed by anything that is “not up to us,” anything that belongs to the realm of chance or Fortune.”

生命也许终究是一场悲剧，但拥有卓越的思想仍然可以让我们自由、快乐的度过一生

“For the Stoics and other Greek philosophers, true happiness, eudaimonia, differed from our modern idea of happiness significantly. For modern people, happiness is a temporary feeling, a mood, or a passing emotional state. For the Greeks, though, eudaimonia was a lasting excellence of character—“an enduring, continuous, and relatively stable state of mind.””

Fun和happiness的区别